Well, crew, New Moon has made like 8 kerbillion dollars this weekend (it’s actually $140.7 million ), which means that the entire world has gone Twilight crazy. Here are some tips for successfully navigating a sparkly vampire-obsessed world. Look, crew, it doesn’t matter if you’ve read the books or seen the movies or not. We’re now living in a Twilight world, controlled by Twilight girls. The army has amassed! They have pocket money and they aren’t afraid to spend it! Sparkly vampires beat Batman at the box office, you guys. Edward Cullen and his stupid Volvo have defeated the Batmobile. This is serious biz, everybody. If Batman can’t even beat the sparkle brigade, who can? YOU CAN, friends, if you follow these simple directions. Pick A Team : You’re either Team Edward (sparkly Volvo-driving vampire) or Team Jacob (that’s the 17-year-old werewolf who never wears a shirt). If a Twihard approaches you in the street and asks you …
